An observation

Today, it occurred to me (through the assistance of a reliable friend) that I come across to most people as--ha ha--an airhead.

How, I do not know.

Okay. I lied. I am rather sure that this is because of my bubbly, happy nature and the high level of my passion for the things that I do. I live passionately. It comes through as excitement and, perhaps, shallowness. But I am not shallow. I get excited about things. I do things fully or not at all. I live, love, and show it. I never thought it would affect me adversely.

Life choices send me down pathways I would not backtrack or stray from. I will not--because I cannot--leave the field of art. I cannot live that way again because it is against my nature. But there are people who look at that choice and think I must not be intelligent enough to make it elsewhere. That's frustrating. I could turn the tables on them and call them boring for settling on whatever career they chose, when they could have chosen whatever field it was because they truly love it. I give others the benefit of the doubt and delve in for the interesting side of them. And I usually find it. But my ever-happy, ready-to-laugh side of me is interpreted as stupid and/or that of an air head.

It makes me want to cry, honestly. How could others think this? How can they not see beyond that? Do I have sit demurely and quietly to get their attention? Do I have to keep my interests and passions silent for fear of the misjudgment? I cannot do that. I cannot refute my nature, deter my ways, and overlook the gifts and passions put in my life by God. This is me.

But I must find a way to present myself--who I am--in a light that also shines on my intellect. On my mind. Show my happiness, show my passion, and show my wit.

I pray for the ability to do this and the clarity to see the way.